It was mid March when Jason and I realized that it was likely that we would have to reschedule our wedding. At first, there was the initial grief over the wedding day, lots of tears, lots of phone calls, lots of emails sent, and many sad days. Following that, was the slow realization of the loss of other wedding related events like the bachelorette & bachelor parties, the bridal shower, rehearsal dinner, and our honeymoon. What hit us the hardest emotionally, was simply trying to re-imagine a new plan. We had been dreaming about our day for over a year and a half and to simply let go of that vision was very very difficult.

Once we were ready to start on a new plan, we created a list of things that were important to us and things that we weren’t to worried about letting go of. We ultimately decided to go ahead with planning a small intimate wedding on our original wedding day, June 20th 2020, and then plan a reception and a dance for next spring 2021. By mid April, we had reached out to all of our vendors explaining our situation and how we were hoping to move forward with our contracts. Some we were able to cancel, & some we were able to reschedule with. For example, we knew that our original venue would no longer work for our new plan. Our florist, Faint Floral & photographer Nicole Marie Photography, on the other hand, were vendors that we were very keen on keeping. By the beginning of May, we had decided on a new venue for our small intimate wedding. We will be getting Married at The Lodge at Panther River with 20 of our closest family and friends.

As of right now, the plan is to have socially distanced seating during the ceremony, as well as hand sanitizer stations, and signs reminding our guests to stay distanced. It is hard to imagine a wedding day without hugs or handshakes, but at the end of the day, we decided that it is just as important to us to simply have our guests with us even at a distance. When it comes to our reception next year, though we haven’t set a date, we have started formulating a plan and ‘vision’ for the day. We are hoping to have a casual evening reception with a food truck, a coffee bus (fingers crossed), and a super fun dance party!

What we have learned is that coming to the realization that you will have to change your wedding plans is the hardest part. Once know that you will have to reschedule your wedding, allow your self to grieve. It is OK to be sad, it is OK to be angry – not many people know how you feel and this whole process can be quite daunting and unknown. Don’t be afraid to reach out to people in the wedding industry for advice, though we are all figuring things out together, I’m sure your photographer or wedding coordinator will be able to help you make decisions or offer their suggestions. Lastly once you have grieved and are ready to move on with a new day, remember that the re-planning process won’t be too difficult – after all, you’ve already done it all before!

Ever since my fiancé and I started dating I have been looking forward to our future wedding. When he finally proposed in January 2019 I was ecstatic. Finally we were able to have our special day! I immediately started looking at venues and began thinking about finding a wedding planner (my fiancé and I both work long hours and there is just no way we would be able to plan a wedding on our own!). Fast forward to 2020 and we could not be more excited. This was going to be our year. All of the little details were coming together and we had just booked our food and wine tasting at our venue (the best part in our opinion). We were getting so excited!

In what seemed like a matter of days our entire world got flipped upside down. We were glued to the news and words like “pandemic”, “death rate”, and “contagion” became part of our every day vocabulary. We switched from working in downtown Calgary every day and enjoying our daily commutes together to working from home and spending all day together. On top of all of this, we both had new demands with our jobs and were working longer and harder than we ever had (let alone thinking about wedding planning).

Within a few days, things started to get crazier than we could have ever imagined. We were still hopeful that we would be able to do all of the things we had planned for the spring – bachelor/bachelorette parties in Invermere and Mexico, food and wine tasting in Jasper, picking out shoes, suits, jewelry, and working on the design for our wedding. Unfortunately, that all changed quickly. We first cancelled our bachelor and bachelorette parties, then food and wine tasting. There were so many unknowns but July is so far away! There’s no way that we would be impacted. Slowly our friends started to react to the current events — cancelling 2 weddings, rescheduling vacations, and we knew that we were going to be next. Within 30 days we went from getting excited to pick up our wedding bands to postponing our entire wedding. Woah. We were devastated. The worst part is that all of this was (and is still) out of our control. We had so many guests travelling from out of province and overseas that there was no way we would feel confident in having a large wedding in mid-July.

We are lucky to have an amazing wedding planner who was right by our side the entire time and honestly she made the whole process seamless (shout out to Madi Miller – Moments by Madeleine). She allowed us time to think through this huge decision while meanwhile she was behind the scenes reaching out to all of our vendors (venue, florist, photographer, and videographer) to see what their response to the pandemic was and how flexible they would be if we had to move our wedding to a later date.

Within a week we had postponed our wedding to July 2021. All of our AMAZING vendors were so supportive. We are extremely fortunate to be able to work with these vendors on our new date next year. It was the best case scenario and we are so grateful that we decided to postpone earlier rather than later. I have spent the last few weeks reading Facebook posts and blog posts of other Calgary couples who are in a similar situation and it is apparent that not all of them are this lucky with being able to postpone so easily. This just adds to the gratitude that we feel towards our vendors, our families, and our friends.

Although we are devastated to have had to postpone our wedding this year, we are also beginning to get excited for 2021! We no longer have to stress about suit fittings, finding shoes, ordering a cake without tasting it, etc. We have the benefit of more time together as a couple, building on our relationship, and focusing on what really matters — staying healthy and staying home. And in the words of Madi, love always wins. We can’t wait to see what 2021 has in store for us!

To put my thoughts about the last couple of months into words is a challenge, but may be best described as an emotional rollercoaster. I have planned, dreamt, detailed and walked through my wedding day for years.

When COVID-19 discussions began, I had no concern that it would affect our July wedding. We moved forward, until we soon noticed that this pandemic was not going away. With elderly grandparents, family from out of town, and being an immunocompromised individual myself, we began to think about what a wedding might look like in this strange and scary season. I quickly called our venue, Mount Norquay, and looked for advice from anyone who would give it, asking, should we stop or continue to hold out hope for summer weddings? I felt a sense of guilt with worrying about our wedding plans when our economy and the poor health prognosis of many people was plastered all over the news.

But truly, I had to grieve the wedding dream that was, and formulate a new reality. When we heard that gatherings would be limited to just fifteen, we had to quickly accept that our day would absolutely not be what we expected and with tears and all we began calling our vendors.

I have been blown away by the kindness, flexibility and support of our vendors, namely our photographer: Alyssa Marie, videographer: Jacqui & Raj Sandhu, venue: Mount Norquay. Each one wanted to jump into action to create a new plan or offer postponement options. We have decided to get married on our day as love is not cancelled, but postpone our reception to celebrate with those we love, when it is safe to do so. Am I confident of a date when it will be safe for gatherings such as this? Absolutely not, but I am learning that flexibility is the most valuable lesson to learn. We are still in the process of letting our guests know that “Love is patient, so let’s celebrate on a new date,” but we wanted to give our out of town guests the news first, for flight and accommodation changes. This news hurt and was not easy to share, but all were very understanding and ready to celebrate with us when the time comes.

Although I feel under qualified to give any advice during this time of uncertainty, I would say, grieve! Grieve the plan and dream that was, before you begin dreaming up a new plan. Next, don’t make rash decisions as vendors and guests are patient and things seem to be changing by the minute. Last, still find a way to celebrate on your day, whether you still get married or you enjoy an extravagant date. Make it a day to remember. I don’t know about you, but this process has made me realize the joy I have in my love story, rather than focusing on the details of a wedding event, and that is the most valuable part of this entire journey.

We always had the idea of postponing in the back of our heads when COVID first hit hard, but we were staying really optimistic about our date and we felt it was far enough out to not have to worry. Once the Alberta government sent out the memo that they were extending mass gathering restriction through summer, we knew we really had to start considering our options. I felt very overwhelmed. I had a million things running through my head. Garrett was the first person I talked to about it, and the calm levelheaded guy that he is, really calmed me down and we laid out our options and the pros/cons of moving forward with the 2020 wedding. We really felt the cons list for the 2020 wedding was just way too long. At the end of the day we felt that it would put a lot of pressure on our guests to have to choose if they felt comfortable enough accepting the risk (that we felt would still be there in September 2020) to attend our wedding. It wasn’t a fair thing for us to put on them. I also felt that, even if we went through with the 2020 wedding I would be so STRESSED leading up to the day wondering if it would happen or not, and so stressed on the day thinking about COVID and guests being at ‘risk’. And I don’t know about other brides… but after this year of COVID – I want that to be the FARTHEST thing from my mind on my wedding day!

Luckily I have an AMAZING team of vendors that were willing to work with me in rescheduling. Once I nailed down a date that would work with all of them, they were super easy to work with on rescheduling to that date. Its sad to take a look at the wedding day count down go from 130 days to 430 days. But having a good support group with friends and family have really helped in knowing that even though I have to wait… the day with be worth it and its going to be amazing.

HAVE AN OPEN MIND! I went into it with the set expectations of what I thought my dream wedding would be. Once I opened up my mind to other options it really let in some light and positivity to what my wedding day could be. The day doesn’t define the wedding. Its all about the celebration of our love together, with the friends and family we all love so much. It doesn’t matter where or when. It’s just important we are all healthy, safe and in love!

Neil and I already have a crazy enough story that this pandemic has really just thrown us for another loop in the loops we were already navigating. We got engaged on a rooftop in Istanbul while we were living in Turkey back in October of 2017. Living in Turkey was challenging to navigate as a common-law couple since the country does not recognize common-law, so we made the decision to fly back to Canada for a quick visit and a legal ceremony with our immediate family present. It was always the plan when we moved back to have our what we called “real wedding” where we would be able to make that commitment to each other in front of those who are important to us then celebrate with everyone we love.

When we began social distancing and working from home back in March, I did reach out to all our vendors and we were all very much on the same page that there was no way this thing could last until June 20 and we should proceed as normal. It wasn’t until our golf course wedding venue informed us that they were cancelling upcoming events and temporarily laying off most of their event staff that we started to worry. So, in April after two years of planning our wedding we came to the difficult realization that we needed to start working on a plan B. We cancelled our wedding with the golf course venue, who were amazing and completely understanding, and started planning a whole new event. We were very fortunate that back in November when we attended a friend’s wedding in Jamaica, that we met one of the amazing owners of Venue 308 and her husband, so that was the first place we went!

Given that most spring 2020 brides were in the same boat the Saturday date pickings were slim, but we warmed up to the idea of a Halloween wedding, the last Saturday they had available in 2020. We notified all the vendors, who we can not thank enough as every single one has been amazing and accommodating, sent an update video to our guests, and made the switch! With that all secured and taken care of Neil and I were still feeling blue about what to do on June 20, the date we had been looking forward to for almost two years now. I was speaking with our photographer Monica with Red Bloom photography, as I have done quite regularly over the past two years, and we came up with the idea of still doing our first look and reading our vows to one another. Our videographer Nathan with Folklore Films was quickly on board and I started doing some digging into a location. Originally we thought Fish Creek Park, but I was hoping to find something a little more private and secluded, which was when I reached out to Azuridge Estates. We were able to book for our original date June 20, 2020, and will be able to have a romantic evening just Neil and I, that will all be captured by Monica and Nathan.

I admit nothing about our love story has been how I envisioned this phase in my life playing out, but it’s being able to take a step back and go with the flow that has allowed us to find our perfect in the imperfect. My heart goes out to all the couples like us and my advice would be to allow yourself time to mourn the loss of the day you envisioned, but then take the opportunity to plan a new day and find your perfect.

Our original wedding date was set for July 18, 2020 and has now been postponed to September 26, 2020 … and we’re pretty positive that date won’t stick either. With my sister coming from over seas, we just don’t think our wedding will realistically happen in the year 2020 anymore. So sadly, we are waiting until The middle of June to see if it needs to be cancelled for this year and then at that point we won’t be making anymore concrete plans for quite some time.

Unfortunately the time that is regularly supposed to be filled with excitement and bliss has been replaced with anxiety and uncertainty. The worst part of it all is absolutely the unknown. Not knowing if your wedding will happen, when it will happen, how many people can attend, if you can have a buffet dinner, and on and on. The thing that has been most helpful for me through all of this is focusing on the “new” plans and not getting held up on what was supposed to be. I’ve found it super helpful to set a date when I will make a decision to move forward or make new plans and stick to that date. That way it feels like I have control over my own wedding again instead of COVID taking charge.

Lucky for me, all of my vendors have also been fantastic through all of this. Alpine Catering had no problem moving to another date and our original venue had to be changed and they gave our full deposit back without any hesitation. For the most part, I think most vendors are very understanding of the situation which has been such a stress reliever! Another thing that has been majorly helpful is reading Bronte Bride blog posts. Everyone is facing very similar problems in the bride community and it’s so nice to hear how other brides are coping. It’s also so nice to know they are there to help you with any questions you may have. When all of this started, Rebekah reached out to see if she could assist me in any way, which was so comforting. I’ll definitely continue to stay up to date with the Bronte Bride community for tips and tricks with how to handle all this craziness!

As I sit here today at the end of May thinking about my wedding in 5 weeks, it is not exactly what I had always pictured. The morning getting ready with my girls, the 250 sets of eyes on me as I walk down the aisle with my parents, the huge dance party and the numerous hugs and kisses being thrown my way are all now visions of past expectations.

The day we decided to elope on our original date and postpone our wedding dance to 2021 was an emotional one. Ups and downs, excitement and disappointments but the most intense emotion were uneasy feelings of the unknown. Is this the right thing, will I look back in disappointment, will my family will they be upset?

After the shock of knowing my perfectly planned wedding was going to be different because of a PLAGUE, I sat down and wrote all the reasons I am excited and boy are there many! After making this list, everything felt easier. My gratitude, love and excitement came back about our new plan. All I could see were the benefits of our new plan.

With every decoration plan we lost, we gained intimacy. With every dream of the wedding we forfeited, we developed dreams for our future home. With every tear I shed, I opened up another place in my heart for my partner. But most of all with every day that has passed I have the realization my original wedding plan was never for me to have, but rather to remind me of how grateful I am for everything else.

I am seeing many late summer brides asking questions now that it looks like they may need to postpone, and I wanted to offer some advice as I remember being exactly where they are now.

1. Write down a list of things you are excited for your new wedding plan and put this on your fridge, beside your bed and read this everyday.
Mine include:
– Being able to focus on my future husband and my love rather than a big event
– No stress the day of my wedding
– Being able to have a big party with no stress
– GETTING TO WEAR MY DRESS TWICE
– Having way more money saved for a house due to not paying for a wedding

2. Talk to your vendors ASAP and be understanding.
Emotions are so high right now, but I promise a little bit of kindness and understanding will go along way with you vendors. They may have to close their businesses, go into debt and worry about feeding their family through all of this. Your vendors will be accommodating but please remember this when demanding full refunds.

3. Try to shop local for anything you need including your rings, flowers, decor, beauty products etc. It will be way easier to get for you and help our city stay alive.

I promise your family, friends and vendors will be there for you just as mine were there for me.

Now, Take a deep breath and remember you are resilient, you are loved and you are safe. Now recognize that this friggen sucks and is absolutely not fair, some days are going to be exciting and some days are going to be heartbreaking and that is ok. You are not alone and your feelings are valid. This is going to be one hell of a story to tell your grandkids.

What a year we have had so far, and who would have thought in 2020, we’d be dealing with a global pandemic! With the beginnings of COVID in Canada being documented in early March 2020, I honestly believed, there would be a quick turnaround to life going back to “normal”. With my wedding ceremony and reception booked for July 2020, I at first felt quite relaxed and casual about COVID and its potential effects. As news reports continued to roll out that casted a darker and darker shadow on society, not to mention the harsh reality of the global economy tanking, and then getting news that my employment had also been compromised, my wedding day was very quickly starting to look different than my fiancé and I had planned and anticipated.

Our guest list includes a total of 130 people, of which more than 50% are from other provinces and countries. As things continued to deteriorate with more cases and more deaths being confirmed daily, we were suddenly hit with the truth that our Plan A wedding was no more than a dream, and that a Plan B would be our reality. With a lot of conversations, love and support from family and friends, my fiancé and I quickly recognized that we needed to make some changes to our attitude and accept that although we both needed to get excited about a new plan that would look quite different than the somewhat traditional wedding events and celebration we had wanted.

We struggled at first with the idea of celebrating our wedding reception almost a year after we get married; what would a bachelor/bachelorette look like, showers, etc.? There were so many things that ran through your minds; we really had to work on allowing ourselves to grieve initial ideas/expectations and understand that people will still want to celebrate our union with us (and likely party more in 2021) regardless of circumstances, but more so after such an isolated and difficult start to 2020.

After navigating and working through these last few months together, we are even more excited to celebrate our union, and reminded that when it all comes down to it, we are most of all excited to be married to our best friend, no matter what that looks like.